For myself, I had started my fitness journey many years ago. I always aspired to be in great shape.
For me, It was easy to make it to the gym. I always was able to do high cardio and stay relatively thin.
As my early twenties unfolded I found myself partying more and more. Staying thin became very easy. Eventually my partying took over and it became harder to work on me in a healthy way. Partying progressed into a dark place for me. I wasn’t able to stay sober for long at all. I could kick my habits for a month or two, eventually always going back to my old ways. It was me, it was the company I kept and the places I went. I couldn’t seem to change the direction I was headed, for a long time.
Ultimately I landed a bed in rehab.
For those people who think rehab is a horrible place for broken people, I’d have to say your wrong. I showed up very broken but I did not leave broken. When I walked into my treatment center I was so lost. I didn’t know who I was, who I wanted to be or who I could be. I was damaged and had no coping skills at all. It was in rehab I learned to fight for my life. I learned that I didn’t need to be weak. I learned I didn’t need to be so hard on myself. I learned people loved me for me. It was there that I learned I had a voice. That it was my job to use that voice with compassion and for good. I found a way not to be selfish.
We did things like give back to the community, but also how to give back to ourselves. I honestly didn’t know how to live in a way that made me internally happy before I got to rehab. Rehab is a gift, a gift that I have been so grateful to receive. Getting sober was work from the start. After my detox it was a mental game to stay strong.
When I got sober I packed on the weight. I went from 125-130lbs to an easy 155-160lbs. This was the highest weight I had ever been. It wasn’t that this weight is not a healthy weight for some, but for me it felt frustrating. It wasn’t where I wanted to be. I hit the gym hard. Back then, it wasn’t about so much shedding the weight at the beginning, but about keeping my sanity.
I was in my first year sobriety and feeling a little crazy. I wasn’t working, and I knew if I made it to the gym, I did something right that day.
Coming up to my second year of sobriety I felt like I wanted to reach new goals in the gym. Through hard work I shed that 25lbs I gained and was feeling pretty good about it.
I wanted more though. I wanted to sculpt my frame into what I had always really gone to the gym to achieve through out the years.
Today, I feel I am finally on my way to doing so. I work hard and lift heavy. I am seeing the results I have wanted to see for so long. I work on a proper diet and following a program outlined for me.
The gym is so much more to me then a place to go to lose weight or sculpt my body. It is at the gym that I sculpt my mind. It’s a place I get to leave it all on the floor. I get to be an achiever there. No matter how my professional or personal life is going, its my outlet and its my savior. It’s where I get to work on me and I love the therapy it gives me.
On my journey of bettering myself, I am never done. I will always strive to grow, mentally physically emotionally and spiritually. With the gym as an outlet I know I can do just that.
Renae Cathleen, Fitness Enthusiast.
Any individuals in sports and fitness who would like to share their voice, please submit to hank@hankfittraining.com